God Is Still Good
A couple weeks ago I was sitting at Green River Dam just outside of Campbellsville. I was looking down at the lake with tears welling in my eyes and begging God to show me his goodness. I know He is good, but I was having trouble seeing it in that moment. Over the past few weeks, so much had happened and it all seemed to be bad. I work in Collegiate Athletics, so my work is very much affected. I am from a big family and yet I live alone and the quiet is sometimes overwhelming. I can’t see and hug the people I have been around for months (I’m a hugger, guys. This is hard). My world has been shaken and my future is currently uncertain.
In order to stay sane, I have been taking a walk every day that the weather permits. I often listen to worship music during this time. One of my favorites is called “There was Jesus” by Zach Williams and Dolly Parton. The first verse says “When the life I had came crashing to the ground, when the friends I had were nowhere to be found, there was Jesus.” No matter the hardship, there is always Jesus.
In my office hangs a painting my sister made me when I graduated. It says “And if not, He is still good” along with the verses for the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego in the fiery furnace. While those are not the actual words said in the story, the message gives me hope. It gives me confidence that even if this virus doesn’t go away when we want it and our athletes have to remain off campus for a lot longer and if I don’t get to return to the sideline of the football field come August and if I don’t get to see my family this summer like we had planned, God is still good. He is still good because a year from now I will look back and see that in the end His plan was better than mine. Psalm 27:13 says, “I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.” I want to live that out in the days where things are uncertain and the future is scary and things are not “normal.”
About a week after my emotional breakdown at the Dam, I returned. This time I sat on the river side so I could see the water rushing out. I kept thinking that it was a perfect reminder that sometimes chaos can be beautiful. I am trying the embrace the chaos and enjoy the sunshine. (I am more grateful than you will ever know that quarantining didn’t happen during December). I am praying for all of you and pray that this sickness ends soon. But if not, He is still good!